So you have been dumped? Rather than get up and face the world, you want to sit at home, lonely and wallowing in the pain and misery after your break up. You’ve probably been trying to find ways to win back your ex so you can be happy once again. It’s true that the pain you feel from the breakup is real and it’s not easy to get over it. You probably think that winning back your ex is the only way that pain will ease. There’s help on the horizon for you.

For starters, you are already taking the first step. You are seeking outside help to deal with this matter. And it’s a big matter that one cannot handle on their own by themselves. You know that sitting in front of the television set crying your eyes out does no good. Believe it or not, you’re a step ahead of those who don’t know how to get past the broken heart and weeping stage. You are seeking help to get past the pain of breaking up where they are not.

The next thing you should realize to get past the hurt is to not contact your ex at any point for a month. If you want to win back your ex, this is the first and foremost thing you need to follow. This time away gives you time and your ex time to sort through all the emotional baggage that was in the relationship. If space is not given, a happy reunion will be soured. Make sure to give your ex some space so that he or she can miss you. This is the time to do something for you both.

Once you’ve gotten past this obstacle, devise a plan that sees you back with your ex as well as dumping the breakup pain you feel inside your heart. If you want your ex back, this plan is vital to the success of your goal.

Everyone dream is to find someone they can spend the rest of their life with. Finding this person may give you a feeling of euphoria, happier than you’ve ever been, feeling like nothing is to much for you to do. But, break ups do happen and no one is immune from it happening to them. Sometimes a break up is a good thing, others can be undone. Do you think you can’t live without your ex, do you want your ex back? Here are some tips for getting your ex back.

1. Most important, you need to be thinking clearly to get your ex back. Most people can tell when you have something on your mind, including your ex. You must clear your thoughts about how bad you want your ex back. Don’t think about the future of your relationship. Let your thoughts go, it will help make your communication with your ex better. And that will improve your chances of getting back together with your ex.

2. Avoid selling out if you want your ex back. You are probably willing to do anything within your power to get your ex back, but don’t beg and apologize no matter how badly you want your ex back. Be strong and focused, stay calm and concentrate on being happy without your ex, that will get their attention.

3. The old you needs to change, after all it contributed to your breakup in the first place. To get back with your ex, you need to change something about your personality or behavior that your ex says wow, it’s the wow factor. Maybe you can work out more or get a better job. Create a better image of yourself and your ex will notice and respond.

4. Don’t dwell on the past and what led to your breakup, but don’t forget either because you don’t want to make the same mistake twice. Learn from the past and turn these events into a learning experience. If you should get back with your ex, this is the best way to not repeat your mistakes.

5. Finally, create a plan. Don’t rely on emotion, hoping for positive results. You need a good plan. Use your logic and put some thought into developing a plan. You will be a lot more successful entering a situation with a well thought out plan and have a better chance at getting back with your ex.

Relationship are fragile, they constantly need to be built up and maintained to keep them healthy and flourishing. Still, breakups happen, and they can cause hurt feelings, be stressful and difficult to deal with. Most often people want to get back at their ex, but you have to ask yourself if that is the best route to take. One influential way can put your ex in a predicament, but may also work to repair your former relationship. These 5 tips can serve a dual purpose, while they work to get back at your ex, they may also work to getting your ex back.

1. Don’t be needy. Act strong, no one likes having someone who is needy hanging around. Stop begging and exhibiting behavior that makes you seem desperate. Let your ex see that you have moved on and are doing fine by yourself. When your ex sees you have moved on, they will notice that they have not.

2. Shut down communication with your ex. At least minimize communication even though it seems counterintuitive when what your really want is to get back together. Yet, it is one of the most important steps to take whether you’re getting back at your ex or trying to get back together. By taking some time away from your ex it allows time for the dust to settle and your ex will realize just how important your relationship was.

3. Be flexible. This may have been a side of you that was missing during your relationship and your ex may be surprised to see this side of you. Don’t be demanding or forceful with your ex like giving them timelines to move out or pick up their things. Listen and sympathize with your ex, this may inspire them to build lines of communication and rekindle the relationship.

4. Socialize. Get out of the house, spend time with friends, work on building a social network and get some entertainment in your life. This doesn’t mean you need to date or try to pick up the opposite sex, but you do need to get out and enjoy life. This will serve two purposes, it is therapeutic and it shows your ex that they have let a big catch get away.

5. Be yourself. It may have been awhile since you acted as yourself. Your ex fell in love you because of who you once were. Go back to being that person and let your ex remember why they loved you in the first place. This renewed perception will rub off on your ex and be a reminder of why you had a relationship to begin with.