Website for Children and teens whose parents are separated or divorced
Hi! Welcome to CHaT First,
a website for children and teens
whose parents have separated or divorced.
You will find lots of information about what happens when your parents’ separate and live in separate places, and tips to help you to cope.
It can be tough for some children when their parents live apart. However, from what other children have been telling us, we know that with some help things can get better.
All families are different. It is important to remember that we might not have covered exactly what is happening in your family. However, we have also included sections so you can find more help if you need it.
There is also information on this web site for your parents so they can understand more about your experiences and feelings and how best to help you – we hope you can show them this web site too.
Read more…ChatFirst.com.au
Categories: Resources Tags: chat first, children and divorce, Divorce, separation, teenagers and divorce
Children’s Emotional Stress Linked With Divorcing Parents
by Owais Siddiqui
Divorce and split up was not very long ago was looked upon as a taboo in the society. Today it has become turned from a glitch into likelihood for most of the marriages. The ratio has not just doubled but as a matter of fact increased manifolds to an extent that it is one out of three families in USA that are headed by single parents.
Couples which decide to split up usually have their own issues to consider but they overlook the interests of their off springs who are at a loss at this traumatic change in stance of their family life. For both boys and girls, it is very essential to have connection with both the parents as each has a role to play in their lives which finally lead to a fully developed personality without any negative personality traits.
Most children are not able to express their distress and end up with having behavior problems that cannot be linked with the absence of a parent initially but psychological evaluation of such children always reveal the fact that all problems are related to the missing interaction with the other parent.
Stress Indicators For Children With Newly Separated Parents
When a divorce takes place, usually the parents are too busy to notice any emotional change in a child who is being equally affected by this recent development. These are different for different age groups but the most common ones for all ages is “Depression” which they show in different ways such as:
- Falling grades at school.
- Lack of appetite.
- Lack of interest in other activities like sports etc.
- Increased bed wetting and nightmares in younger children.
- Spending more time away from home in teens.
- Aggressive behavior.
- Undue quarrels between siblings
- Sleep disorders.
- Menstrual irregularities in teenage girls.
Remedial Measures
The most important factor for a parent should always be the wellbeing of their children. The ideal would be that such a separation be avoided. But when this is not possible then a method should be adopted such that both the parents should continue to remain in contact with the children as a parent.
In certain cases when this is not possible, parent who is in custody of the children has to do a bit more to reduce their children’s stress. Most importantly a child should never be blamed for the situation that led to the separation between the parents, nor should the absent parent be blamed unnecessarily for the event as it will be unfair for the other as he or she is not present to defend.
In order to reduce the stress of your child you have to understand that you are not the only one who has gone through a traumatic situation alone, they have a greater loss as you may find another partner but that will not ever replace the biological parent who is most likely not going to reunite. You can reduce their stress by adopting a few simple remedies:
* Spend more time and give extra affection to your children with frequent hugs and kisses.
* Talk to them about the issues relatively to their age and make them understand it in the simplest way.
* Give them a little extra attention and this will also help you through the initial phase.
* Let the children be in contact with the other parent and exchange notes with your ex-spouse so that you both know how the children are feeling about it and how to cope with things in the longer run.
About the Author
http://hubpages.com/profile/Owais+Siddiqui http://choosing-a-copywriter.blogspot.com/ http://www.instantparentsuccess.com/
Categories: Articles Tags: aggressive behaviour, bed wetting, Children, Divorce, lack of appetite, nightmares
Whose Fault Is This Divorce Anyway
Whose Fault Is This Divorce Anyway? by Melissa Gordon
Sometimes couples separate because their marriage was just not meant to succeed.
They may well separate on good terms, with no rancor or bitterness, because things just did not work out for them as a couple. Other times it will be down to irreconcilable differences. They may just have been poorly matched to start off with, but still, it is nobody’s fault, and after a period of separation they can agree to a divorce and go their
separate ways for good, to pursue other dreams. And then sometimes there is someone to blame. This kind of divorce will often be brought unilaterally by the spouse who has been the victim of whatever wrong has been committed.But what constitutes a “fault”? What are reasonable grounds to bring a divorce case, potentially occasioning a large financial pay off when the case goes through? Generally, it requires some amount of wrongdoing on the part of the defendant. The most obvious, and most common reason why couples get divorced is pure and simple adultery. As the standard marriage vows say “forsaking all others”, if one party in the marriage is prepared to have an affair it is reasonable to conclude that they
have broken their marriage vows. Adultery generally will entail sexual contact with a third party outside the marriage, but it is not obligatory for sex to play a part. If one party has been dating or romantically involved with a third party, this is enough to constitute adultery.
They may well separate on good terms, with no rancor or bitterness, because things just did not work out for them as a couple. Other times it will be down to irreconcilable differences. They may just have been poorly matched to start off with, but still, it is nobody’s fault, and after a period of separation they can agree to a divorce and go their
separate ways for good, to pursue other dreams. And then sometimes there is someone to blame. This kind of divorce will often be brought unilaterally by the spouse who has been the victim of whatever wrong has been committed.But what constitutes a “fault”? What are reasonable grounds to bring a divorce case, potentially occasioning a large financial pay off when the case goes through? Generally, it requires some amount of wrongdoing on the part of the defendant. The most obvious, and most common reason why couples get divorced is pure and simple adultery. As the standard marriage vows say “forsaking all others”, if one party in the marriage is prepared to have an affair it is reasonable to conclude that they
have broken their marriage vows. Adultery generally will entail sexual contact with a third party outside the marriage, but it is not obligatory for sex to play a part. If one party has been dating or romantically involved with a third party, this is enough to constitute adultery.
Another reason accepted as constituting a “fault” in a fault divorce is desertion. If one partner spends more and more time away from the marital home, they may be divorced on the grounds of constructive desertion – continuing absences hinting at a likely eventual departure.
Equally, they might just leave the marital home altogether, at which point they are liable to be taken to court on that basis.
It is also possible to file for divorce on the grounds of physical or mental cruelty. In the case of mental cruelty this will need to
constitute a repeat offence, as one case can easily be put down to misinterpretation or potentially provocation. But in the case of physical violence, once is enough to justify bringing a legal case to end the marriage. Equally, so may insanity – defined as no longer being of sound mind, which may constitute grounds for divorce on the basis of fear for personal safety – as may alcohol or drug abuse for similar reasons.
It may also be possible in some states to divorce a partner for sexual impotence or for the comparatively worse crime of infecting the other spouse with a venereal disease. It is NOT considered acceptable to divorce a spouse due to being bored in the marriage, nor may you divorce someone for snoring. Some protection needs to remain for the institution of marriage, after all, and if there are minor problems the idea is that you work on them. Divorce may be easier than before, but just cause still needs to be presented to dissolve a marriage.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational and entertainment
purposes only, and should not be construed as legal advice on any
subject matter.
About the Author
LegalBuffet.com
is a complete online resource that compares the legal services offered
by various online companies. Find the best company for your online divorce needs at http://legalbuffet.com/divorce-services /.
Categories: Divorce Tags: abuse, adultery, desertion, Divorce, grounds for divorce, sexual impotence